The Machine
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- Trailer 1 (02:10)
Movie Info & Cast
Synopsis
Set 23 years after the original story which inspired it, The Machine finds Bert (Bert Kreischer) facing familial crisis and the arrival of his estranged father (Mark Hamill) when the ghost of his booze-soaked past arrives: a murderous mobster (Iva Babic) hellbent on kidnapping Bert back to the motherland to atone for his crimes. Together, he and his father must retrace the steps of his younger self (Jimmy Tatro) in the midst of a war between a sociopathic crime family while they attempt to find common ground.
Cast
- Bert Kreischer
- Mark Hamill
- Jimmy Tatro
- Iva Babic
- Robert Maaser
- Stephanie Kurtzuba
- Jessica Gabor
- Rita Bernard Shaw
- Nikola Ðuricko
- Oleg Taktarov
Letterboxd User Reviews
2.5
34.8K
8.2K
5.6K
- May 26, 2023
Fat white dads Black Panther
Cole SemmensMay 25, 2023the unbearable weight of massive talent
𐂂 𝖘𝖊𝖆𝖒𝐯𝖘 𐂂May 24, 2023If someone likes Bert Chrysler, you already know they arent funny.
3OH3 - May 25, 2023
Mark Hamill does cocaine. This was fun, if you’re a big fan of Bert you’ll probably have a good time, if not this movie isn’t for you. A little too long, and not all the jokes land but there are some great ones, and surprisingly some cool action.
🎥KAug 9, 2023this is like if a studio made an action movie about my fun uncle who can be a little bit problematic
hooverJul 7, 2023This was surprisingly fun even if it’s equally dumb. Jimmy Tatro as young Bert Kreischer is inspired casting. I think what won me over was when Idina said “Did I do that?” I’m pretty sure I did a spit take. It’s otherwise largely forgettable, but I had an enjoyable drive…
Kevflix And Chill - May 24, 2023
oh wow drunk american who isnt funny in russia ooooh ahhh wow much funny
Eli HoweSep 27, 2023The Machine also goes by the name "Bert", And can be a big extrovert. To Russia with love, When push comes to shove, He's ready to take off his shirt.
JBirdJun 6, 2023“I guess we are just built different“ The Machine follows Bert Kreischer in present day as he is dealing with family turbulence while his drunken past catches up with him from 20 years ago on a college semester abroad in Russia. Bert’s semi-biographical film about his…
Ty Laird
Queue Community Reviews
76%
Community 2,161
Top Reviews
- Cory Nunez likedThe Machine
I was surprised at how good it was! I know Bert is a funny man, but going in I wasn’t expecting much. I was honestly blown away at how funny it was in small moments, and how the same jokes didn’t get old but got better, and the storytelling & transitions were so great! 7.5/10
Jeffmeister dislikedThe MachineOne of the worst movies I have ever seen.
Craig Bennett is "meh" onThe MachineI wanted to like this so much. Brent’s not as funny as Todd, but still had high hopes. The whole thing feels like every scene was a first take. Hamill and Tatro try their best, and there are some really funny moments, but it just can’t overcome poor writing and direction.
- Luke lovedThe Machine
I love Bert Kreischer, so the odds of me being lenient on this are high. This is big stupid fun, emphasis on stupid, and it has bargain bin emotional sentiments. But as a fan I couldn’t help but have a big dumb giddy grin on my face ALMOST the whole time
Sky is "meh" onThe MachineI think it was too corny. Bert is a funny guy but this movie isn’t funny and it has bad acting. Stopped watching halfway
Johnny is "meh" onThe MachineI really thought I was going to like this more, wasn’t as funny as I thought it’d be and it was pretty corny and fake
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Albin dislikedThe MachineTurned it off after 20 min, not all comedians are actors. Just painful
Elijah lovedThe MachineHOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THE MACHINE
Caleb Rose likedThe MachineThe movie starts in kind of an alternate reality where Bert is a bad parent/ man. This made me want to stop watching because it contradicts what I love about Bert’s comedy. I hung in there, and the movie was hilarious. Excellent action, funny dialogue, and funny references. 8/10
Atom Users Reviews
POPULAR TAGS
Reviews
- RDRoy Dat Boi
Excellent film, even better if you’ve seen Bert’s stand-up and know more about the story and some of his life too. Great scenes with solid story, corny at times but pungently so to the point where it’s proper funny.
VVVictor VictorThis is basically a Bert Kreischer movie with his type of humor. So beware of that. Other than that, it’s a decent comedy flick.
OPOrestes PintoWas not funny
- RMRobert M
Wait for streaming
JBJoey BallantineFound it to be just okay. Felt filled with cliches and was expecting more from my favorite comedian.
JRJoel RodriguezIf you are a Bert Kreischer fan you will love the movie.
- ELEvan Leduc
If you love Bert Kreischer and know his style of comedy then you’ll understand and love this movie for what it is.
JMJamison MurawskiIt was a fun ride, but overshadowed by blocky acting and poor script writing. If you were expecting this to win awards, think again. It is a good movie to have a little buzz and enjoy.
DFdylan fallasactually follows a good story and has great comedy moments
Metacritic
May 26, 2023
Writers Kevin Biegel and Scotty Landes adapt Kreischer’s unbelievable viral story about robbing a train with Russian mobsters into a retrospective on the comedian’s tumultuous history with excess—a tonal misfire of fantastical absurdity clashing against emotional confessions.
Matt Donato
Paste Magazine
May 26, 2023
The Machine really goes off the rails when it tries to turn itself into an action movie. The blandly violent fight sequences are only watchable because Hamill gets the occasional opportunity to show off his dorky-dad-on-cocaine schtick between punches.
Christian Zilko
IndieWire
May 26, 2023
Hamill, however, is the MVP, continuing to deliver some of his best work as an older man. When he leaves the action for a spell, the energy leaves the movie.
Luke Y. Thompson
The A.V. Club
Frequently Asked Questions
Is The Machine (2023) family-friendly?
The movie has been rated as R, meaning that Under 17 requires an adult accompaniment.
How long is The Machine (2023)?
The movie is 1hr 52min long.
What's The Machine (2023) about?
Set 23 years after the original story which inspired it, The Machine finds Bert (Bert Kreischer) facing familial crisis and the arrival of his estranged father (Mark Hamill) when the ghost of his booze-soaked past arrives: a murderous mobster (Iva Babic) hellbent on kidnapping Bert back to the motherland to atone for his crimes. Together, he and his father must retrace the steps of his younger self (Jimmy Tatro) in the midst of a war between a sociopathic crime family while they attempt to find common ground.
Who's the cast of The Machine (2023)?
- Bert Kreischer
- Mark Hamill as Albert Kreischer
- Jimmy Tatro
- Iva Babic
- Robert Maaser as Alexei
- Stephanie Kurtzuba
- Jessica Gabor
- Rita Bernard Shaw
- Nikola Ðuricko
- Oleg Taktarov
Who's the director behind The Machine (2023)?
Peter Atencio directed The Machine (2023).
Who produced The Machine (2023)?
Bert Kreischer produced The Machine (2023).
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