Baywatch Movie Poster

Quotes from Baywatch

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    • Mitch Buchannon: There's your cot, don't jack off on my sheets.
    • [flaming clothing lands on Matt]
    • Matt Brody: That wasn't so bad.
    • [a dismembered foot lands on Matt]
    • [screams]
    • Mitch Buchannon: That's good luck, pick it up.
    • Frankie: Leon's not a man of words he's a man of action.
    • [after Leon speaks]
    • Frankie: See now you've gone and ruined it again.
    • [about CJ Parker]
    • Summer Quinn: Why does she always look like she's running in slow-mo?
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: You see it too?
    • Summer Quinn: And she always looks wet, but not too wet.
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: Right? She's the reason I believe in God.
    • [final scene]
    • Stephanie Holden: *Super* slow motion?
    • Summer Quinn: Yeah.
    • [dryly]
    • CJ Parker: Wow. This is gonna take a while.
    • [winks]
    • Mitch Buchannon: That's how we roll.
    • [end]
    • Mitch Buchannon: Uh, guys, after finding the drugs, helping save Chen and helping me blow up the bad girl with a Roman candle, it's a pleasure to say you are officially no longer trainees.
    • CJ Parker: Whoo!
    • [everyone applauds]
    • Mitch Buchannon: Congratulations!
    • CJ Parker: Yeah, guys.
    • Mitch Buchannon: Hey, guys, one more important thing. I want to introduce you to our new captain who has been running our Hawaii division very successfully for years now: the amazing Captain Casey Jean.
    • [Casey Jean appears in slow motion. Matt and Ronnie are stunned]
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: Is it just me, or is she in...
    • Matt Brody: There's no I in team, but there is a me.
    • Interviewer: Are you dyslexic?
    • Matt Brody: I'm... Caucasian.
    • Mitch Buchannon: How about diamond smugglers who are putting the rocks in surfboards and bringing them ashore?
    • Matt Brody: Everything that you guys are talking about sounds like a really, like, entertaining but far-fetched TV show.
    • Matt Brody: So, Dave had access to Leeds' server.
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: Her server? You mean her network.
    • Matt Brody: Yeah, her network, that's what I meant. Okay, so we just take a flash drive, and we plug it in, you know, get in to her cloud, and then steal all her cookies, right, and then we're straight through the firewall.
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: Okay, literally none of what you said made any sense.
    • Matt Brody: Straight over the firewall.
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: It's not, like, a physical thing you do.
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: She's like some sort of modern-day J Edgar Hoover.
    • Matt Brody: The vacuum guy.
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: No.
    • Matt Brody: Will it work? Maybe. Will there be some surprises along the way? Abso-fucking-lutely. Is anyone gonna die? I don't know. Maybe Ronnie.
    • Ronnie Greenbaum: Sorry, what?
    • CJ Parker: You look amazing, by the way.
    • Victoria Leeds: Well, someone has to.
    • Matt Brody: What do you mean 'You People'?
    • Mitch Buchannon: You don't get to say that. You're just tan.
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