The Bad News Bears (1976) Movie Poster

Quotes from The Bad News Bears (1976)

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    • Kelly: I got a Harley-Davidson. Does that turn you on? Harley-Davidson?
    • [after the Bears lose 18-0]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Come on, fellas. Rome wasn't built in a day.
    • Ogilvie: Yeah, it took several hundred years.
    • [Amanda has been kicked in the chest]
    • Amanda: I know I don't got a lot up there, but what I got sure don't feel too good.
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: Look, Buttermaker, you're not my father and I'll not move an inch to play baseball for you any more. So why don't you get back into that sardine can of yours and go, go vacuum the bottom of the Pacific Ocean? I've got business to take care of. You're blocking my customers with your car.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Those boys aren't very rough. You won't get hurt.
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: That's got nothing to do with it. I'm almost 12 and I'll... I'll be getting a bra soon.
    • [Buttermaker stares. Amanda looks at her chest]
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: Well, maybe in a year or so. I can't be playing all dumb baseball.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: What if he tries something?
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: I'll handle it.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Rolling Stones, 11 years old.
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: I know an 11-year-old girl who is already on the pill.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Don't ever say that word again.
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: Jesus! Just who in the heck you think you are?
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: The goddamned manager, that's who!
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: Big wow!
    • [handing out cups and supporters to the boys]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: There is one thing I forgot to tell you guys. It's a league rule: cups and supporters.
    • Ogilvie: I've been brushing up on my Spanish of late, and I think he is saying something about, you know, his being Catholic, and it's a sin.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Oh, for Christ's sake.
    • [hands it back to Jose]
    • [everyone complains]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Gotta be worn at all times.
    • [more complaints]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Either you wear 'em or you don't wear 'em and you don't play.
    • Jose Agilar: ¡Yo no me voy a poner esto! ¡Esto duele!
    • [Throws his back in the box]
    • ["I'm not going to wear this! It hurts!"]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: What? What are you saying?
    • Amanda Whurlitzer: Hey, Buttermaker! Maybe next spring you'll teach me how to hit.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: You bet.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: This quitting thing, it's a hard habit to break once you start.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Now get back to the stands before I shave off half your mustache and shove it up your left nostril.
    • [comes up to bat and turns to catcher]
    • Ahmad Abdul Rahim: This is for Allah. And it's goin' way out there, sucka.
    • Engelberg: You're not supposed to have open liquor in the car. It's against the law.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: So is murder, Engleberg. Now put that back before you get me in real trouble.
    • [looks at Tanner's black eye]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: What the hell happened to you, Tanner?
    • Engelberg: Tanner got into a fight
    • [because of the first game loss]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Who with?
    • Engelberg: The 7th Grade.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: What?
    • [shouts]
    • Engelberg: The 7th Grade.
    • [leading team chant]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: A busted bat and a long fly ball...
    • Bad News Bears: Any day now, Durocher will call!
    • [after team takes vote to quit the league]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Do you want to quit, Tanner?
    • Tanner Boyle: Crud, No! I want to play ball!
    • Tanner Boyle: We lost eighteen to nothin', Buttercrud, and the Athletics are the worst team in the league!
    • Ahmad Abdul Rahim: *Second* worst...
    • Tanner Boyle: Sorry, I forgot.
    • [team riding in Buttermaker's car to practice]
    • Jimmy Feldman: If you were so great, how come you never made it to the major leagues?
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Contract disputes.
    • [at batting practice]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Hey, Ahmad - even Hank Aaron peels the ol' eyelids before he takes a swing!
    • [helping Buttermaker clean pools]
    • Engelberg: When we're through, can we go swimming?
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: No! Don't jump in Engleberg, you'll flood the valley.
    • [Buttermaker passes out drunk during practise]
    • Regi Tower: Opening day's tomorrow! We don't know what the batting order is. We don't even have our positions set or anything.
    • Tanner Boyle: All we got is a cruddy alky for a manager!
    • [hitting batting practice]
    • [sighs]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Diversionary tactic, Engleberg. Now get the ball...
    • [yells to infield]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: All right, look alive! Let's get one out there!
    • [to Engleberg]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Are you ready?
    • [Buttermaker bunts in front of the plate]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Engleberg?
    • [exasperated]
    • Engelberg: What?
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: That is a bunt - B-U-N-T. The catcher is supposed to pick up the bunt and throw it to first base.
    • Engelberg: Well, how was I supposed to know? You made such a big deal yelling out to them.
    • [announcing Mets batter]
    • P.A. Announcer: Carl Paranski, Number 6...
    • [yelling to Bears fielders]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: The cool Carl Paranski shift!
    • [Ahmad gets hit in a "sensitive area" during a play]
    • Coach Roy Turner: Cleveland! Stretcher!
    • Jimmy Feldman: A stretcher for his balls?
    • Joey Turner: But Dad, I wanted to strike him out!
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: All I know is when we win a game, it's a team win. When we lose a game, it's a team loss.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Hey, can't you hold off of that until after practice?
    • Engelberg: There's energy in chocolate. I need energy.
    • [after getting cold shoulder from everyone]
    • Kelly: Hey does anyone mind if I warm up too?
    • Tanner Boyle: We didn't think you needed anybody but yourself to play catch with!
    • Kelly: Just cool it, runt.
    • [they start fighting]
    • Cleveland: Goddamn class action suits are gonna be the ruin of this country. It wasn't so bad when the courts made us take girls. At least the ones that came could play, but now this.
    • Tanner Boyle: Those Yankees are real turds.
    • [Takes half-empty pint of whiskey from Buttermaker's glove box and holds it up]
    • Engelberg: You're not supposed to have open liquor in the car. It's against the law.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: So is murder, Engelberg. Now put it back before you get me into real trouble.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: First base, second base, third base, home!
    • Toby Whitewood: Do we have to? It's so corny!
    • Bad News Bears: Around them bases we shall roam!
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Jumping catfish! What a great arm! Who is that kid, anyway?
    • Toby Whitewood: Of course he's got a great arm, Buttermaker. He's the best athlete in the area. But you don't understand, that's Kelly Leak.
    • Ahmad Abdul Rahim: You guys talking about Kelly Leak?
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Yeah.
    • Ahmad Abdul Rahim: That dude is a bad mother. You talk about a loan shark. I borrowed a nickel from him last week. He said if I didn't give him a dime by Friday, he'd break my arm.
    • Miguel Agilar: Es un bandido.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: There's chocolate all over this ball.
    • Engelberg: Look, Mr. Buttermaker, quit buggin' me about food. People are always buggin' me about it. My shrink says that's why I'm so fat! So you're not doin' me any good, so just quit it!
    • Amanda: Twelve ballet lessons.
    • Amanda: French jeans.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: I'm not gettin' you any jeans.
    • Amanda: French jeans.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: You know how many pools y'gotta clean...
    • Amanda: Expensive kind.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: To get you a pair of imported jeans? What's a matter with American jeans?
    • Amanda: I don't like 'em.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Who do you think you are? Catfish Hunter?
    • Amanda: Who's he?
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Nine ballet lessons. They're three dollars a shot, for cryin' out loud. I can't afford...
    • Amanda: Twelve ballet lesson or no go.
    • [takes Buttermaker's cigar and throws it out of the car]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: What are you doin'? Give me that! Ah, I just lit that cigar. That's terrible. Make it nine ballet lessons...
    • Amanda: I want the imported kind of jeans.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Jeans?
    • Amanda: Yes.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: What are you talking about.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: You probably lost on purpose. You probably like the little baboon.
    • Amanda: Blow it out your bunghole!
    • Amanda: Who's this turkey think he is? Mickey Mantle?
    • Cleveland: They win one lousy game, the next thing you know, they'll sue for the right to play in Dodger Stadium.
    • Cleveland: I just get an eight count here.
    • White Sox Manager: I know. I know. But, it's okay. I've got the whole thing figured out. Now, this is what I do. I take my two outfielders, Henry and Thor, I play them in right and left center.
    • Cleveland: Oh, you stop it! You're embarrassing yourself!
    • White Sox Manager: Look, three of my White Sox have got the flu. I've got a god damn little Jesus freak in Bakersfield at a revival meeting!
    • Cleveland: I am sorry. I am sorry.
    • White Sox Manager: I've only got eight players!
    • Cleveland: I am sorry! The White Sox are gonna have for forfeit the game. It's a forfeit! It's a forfeit. The White Sox are forfeiting.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Look, Amanda, you're a terrific kid. You shouldn't be hanging around with me. I mean, I'm an old, broken-down, third rate ball player. I like to drink too much. I like to smoke my cigars without anybody bothering me, including you. I'm happy that way! I'm a bum!
    • Coach Roy Turner: I'm not going to talk about winning. I'm going to talk about losing! Because if you guys lose this game, each and every one of you, you're going to have to live with it.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Hey pusshead! Are you crazy? An intentional walk with the bases empty? This is baseball, not backgammon!
    • Coach Roy Turner: My first baseman's lonely.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: The first inside pitch you get, lean into it and let it hit you.
    • Rudi Stein: But, I want to...
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: You want to win the game, don't you?
    • Rudi Stein: Well, I don't want to get hurt.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Alright. Alright. But, you want to win the game.
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: What's the matter with you? All season long you've been laughed at, crapped on. Now, you've got a chance to spit it back in their faces and what do you do? You're out there like a bunch of dead fish, not listening, bonehead plays, mistakes! I mean, don't you want to beat those bastards!
    • [Long pause - Bears stare in silence back at Butterworth]
    • Coach Morris Buttermaker: Alright, get out there now and - do the best you can.
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